Raiheen 3a Beirut!
We're on our way to Beirut! Apart from the felafel and cedars and friends and family, I am quite looking forward to experiences involving individuals such as this gentleman:
Filed under Adventures in Deliciousness, EEEEeeekk!!!, Heeheehee..., Stuff, Super Dooper, WOW, Waiting
Theme Songs
The soundtrack to our wedding is a dilemma of extraordinary proportions. Difficult questions include:
Should I have a special theme song to walk in to?
Should Yehia have a special theme song too?
Should we have a dancey thing where everyone watches us dance to a theme song?
Should we have another dancey thing where everyone watches us dance with particular people to a particular theme song?
Do we have another special theme song for people to listen to when we're signing important documents?
What other opportunities are there for me to be able to subject guests to my favourite music?
Following these important questions and my general procrastinatory nature, I have decided to CHOOSE excellent songs, then CREATE moments for them. Some songs don't really lend themselves to the whole "Happy Happy Happy Day" theme, others don't lend themselves to the "Family Friendly Event" theme. Some I will play despite this.
Songs/artists that will certainly feature are as follows:
1. 99 Luft Ballons - Nena
2. Ya Rayah - Cheb Khaled, Rachid Taha, Faudel
3. Anyone Else But You - The Moldy Peaches
4. Justin Timberlake
5. Sharzy
6. Dolly Parton
7. Prince
8. David Bowie
Songs that have been deemed "unsuitable for such an occasion":
1. Sexy MF - Prince (what I wanted to walk in to, has been vetoed)
2. Tom Waits singing about alcoholism/broken hearts
3. Angry Teenager Music
What have we missed? We are now taking suggestions for any excellent songs that people might suggest for us to play at our wedding. We won't necessarily accept/decline/not laugh at suggestions given. Let us know, what are the bestest songs in the whole wide world?
Filed under Let's Get Married!, Super Dooper, Waiting
Just because you're paranoid don't mean they're not after you...
Apparently lots of people from a certain government aid agency and from a certain government foreign affairs agency have been looking at the adventures of this pink ukulele player A LOT over the last couple of weeks.
As I sit with my tinfoil helmet tied tightly to my head, I can only surmise that one of the following is the reason:
a) They are about to invite me to play David Bowie covers on my pink ukulele at Important Governmental Functions, involving Nametags and Men With Earpieces.
b) They are in awe of my Pinkness, and are about to kidnap me to undertake Secret Government Experiments to extract said Pinkness to create a new, undefeatable "SuperPink" soldier.
c) They want to come to Yehia and my wedding, and are checking this place out so that they can bring the bestest gift ever.
d) They have realised that I am somewhat magnificent, and have shortlisted me for the Inaugural Biannual Award for Outstanding Contribution to the Pursuit of Somewhat Magnificence.
e) They want me to make Roller Skating Disco Queen Bride outfits for ALL of them, so that they can all be Roller Skating Disco Queen Brides. Sorry guys, there can only be ONE Roller Skating Disco Queen Bride, and I WILL beat you all in the dance-off!
f) They have a cunning plan...
g) Something else that I can't think up. EEEeeeEEekkKkk!!!
Filed under EEEEeeekk!!!, Waiting
The Cat has Issues Volume II, and the Funkiest Monkey that ever Popped
The Cat drools. Not buckets, and not down its cheek. Only very occasionally, and onto the floor in little drops. It will sometimes give us a funny look, then turn it's eye to the floor and dispense a thoughtful drip.
Is it an improvement from the head-slamming? This remains to be seen. It is certainly a lot quieter, albeit more slippery. Either way it would seem that it's a happy little cat and we shall observe it closely for any more oddities.
In other news, it would seem that I have become somewhat Nocturnal of late. Whether it be from excessive coffee drinking, obsessions with whacky characters, no routine in my life or general battiness I do not know.
All I do know is that I want Monkey's boots:
Filed under EEEEeeekk!!!, Heeheehee..., Waiting
The Cat has Issues
The Cat has decided to slam it's head into things today. I'm sitting on the couch and she's sprinting around the living room, skidding across the floorboards and crashing into things quite hard, mostly with her head. She sits still for a minute, then gets up and starts running around, doing it all over again. Run, skid, crash, pause... Run, skid, crash, pause...
I'm not sure what to do. Is this normal cat behaviour? I have seen other cats in my life, and they don't seem to find banging their heads on things quite as amusing. Is this normal behaviour for this cat? Perhaps, normally left home alone to it's own devices, The Cat is forced to amuse itself by knocking itself unconscious? Or is it some kind of political protest on behalf of The Cat? Perhaps it can't bear a hunger strike, and has resorted to a different kind of self-harm, in the name of an unknown political cause, in order to stick it up The Man..?
Perhaps I will knit a wee cushion to stick on the top of her head. Perhaps I will knit a large cushion to wrap around all of the hard things in the house. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps...
Filed under EEEEeeekk!!!, Waiting
Port Moresby Conversations
Last night the sky was an angry angry sky. It was so angry that it was throwing water all over Port Moresby, with thunderbolts and lightning (very very frightening me) so big and loud and angry that our whole balcony was shaking. Shaking. I was standing on it, glass of wine in hand, discussing with the sky it's problems. Suffice to say it has many - it's full of holes and such, and soon there won't be anything left of it, what with all this global warming and stuff happening. Poor bugger.
Before all that happened I was in the wine store when a very senior (as in important and powerful, not as in old) staff member of the university came up to me:
"Hello Carolyn, it's lovely to see you."
"Hello."
"I'm looking for a beautiful bottle of red wine to share with people who care to come and visit me in my office."
"Well, you're looking at white wine right now. Red is over there."
"Thankyou my dear. See you soon."
This morning we had to do away with our Haus Meri (cleaning lady) because she was stealing our monies. We didn't "do away with" her in a mafia kind of way, we just told her that her services are no longer needed. Our previous Haus Meri had been offered a better job and abandoned us, but she recommended her sister as a good replacement, who promptly began stealing monies little by little from around the house. She left this morning with quiet resignation. We called her sister to let her know, whose response was:
"Oh yes, she's not as honest as me. I know that. She lives in Gerehu, and she doesn't come to my house."
After this revelation I came to work, and sat down to do some of that said work. A man stood outside my office window, staring at me.
"Can I help you?"
"Yes, I want to speak to that man over there." (pointing through my office to a man on the other side of the hallway)
"Well why don't you go to his office window and talk to him there?"
"No, it's alright, I'll talk to him here."
"I'd rather you didn't, because I'm trying to do my work."
"Oh. I see. We won't be long, I just need to talk to him for a minute."
"I'd really rather you didn't..."
"Oh, ok then. Continue."
Filed under Adventures in Deliciousness, Crapola, EEEEeeekk!!!, Heeheehee..., So they said..., Waiting
More Interesting Things
1. In exactly ONE MONTH I will be 25. Just in case you can't count, that's Thursday March 1st. Please prepare all gifts, hugs, well-wishes, etc. for a timely celebration.
2. I am leaving in 7 weeks. EEEEEKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!
3. Someone quite lovely is getting their brain fixed. Good luck, lovely person. Don't worry, I'll be there in 7 weeks to sing you lullabies, aka David Bowie covers on my pink ukulele.
4. People shouldn't get that drunk at their brother's wedding, even if it is Yehia's fault.
5. If people do get that drunk, they probably shouldn't talk about their testicles, and the said testicles' relationship to squishy cheese. Nor should they demonstrate.
6. Ants are trying to eat me alive. Probably because I'm delicious.
7. I am moving offices, across the hall. For my last seven weeks of work. Efficient.
8. There's a kind of hush all over the university today.
9. There have been so many blackouts today, it's ridiculous. At least two every hour. Damn UPS, I have to stay at work!
10. We're moving towards finalising a wedding date. We have a wedding month, and will let you know when the date is when we know. Hooray!
Filed under Crapola, EEEEeeekk!!!, Exciting Acquisitions, Heeheehee..., Super Dooper, Waiting
What One does when One doesn't want to do One's work
I am Cranky with my work because it sucks, at the moment.
So in the midst of writing Terse Yet Diplomatic emails to the people who didn't do their job, and Blunt Yet Diplomatic emails to the people in charge of the people who didn't do their job, I'm entertaining myself with the newspaper.
Flash Gordon needs to watch out, because whoever shot Dale still has that slingshot, and they might get him too!
Only in PNG could a member of the opposition get a cabinet seat. That's right, the PM gave a cabinet seat to a member of the opposition party. Only in PNG. Ah, Papua New Guinea.
I'm afraid I can't ge my thumbs up to the new Besta tuna. I just can't. I tried, and I can't.
No, I am not in the centre of a vortex of new ideas, change and confusion! I feel a distinct lack of all three! You lie, stars!
Ooh, jobs! To be a driver, One must be 'Of sober habits'. One is not of sober habits. One can't be a driver. Dang.
Goodness. One must be of sober habits to be a Regional Sales Supervisor Retail Division, too. And to be a Branch Manager, but not to be a Member Service Officer. My career opportunities seem to be quite limited in PNG.
Apparently a wedge-shaped coastline indentation is a ria. That's what it said when I did 16-down and 7-down and 17-down. 7-down is assail, but the clue to 35-across is assail! Weird! What is a table-shaped hill? I got calms with drugs very quickly. And how can a popular drink not be vodka? Ok, material for overalls is apparently denim, which makes a table-shaped hill a mesa. Hmmm.
And I'm just not amused by blondie. Boring little twat.
I don't think the paper is really helping.
Forgot This Too
Ok I forgot to mention this too.
I'm halfway through PNG today.
Well, kind of. Not literally, in a way. But really, I am. Halfway as in halfway through my 12-month assignment. As in 6 months today. Halfway. Through. My. Stay. In. PNG.
EEEEEEEEEEeeeeEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!
So many more things to do! So many more animals to poke! So many more people to play with! So many more crazy things to eat! So many more things to be scared of! So many more t-shirts to see!
Did I mention eek?
EeeeeeEEEEEeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Filed under Adventures in Deliciousness, Crapola, EEEEeeekk!!!, Exciting Acquisitions, Heeheehee..., Miscellany, So they said..., Super Dooper, T-Shirt Of The Day, WOW, Waiting
Official End to Ranting
Ok, I have decided to stop ranting this week. Whilst I am still in this incredibly frustrating limbo of not being allowed to go back to work because of the security situation, at least I have decent internet access.
So whilst I'm not doing much of my normal work with the people who need to be worked with, I'm catching up on all of the journal articles that I can't access at the university, and I'm actually able to reply when people email me. Today at least. So email me, people, and feel the love (today at least)!!!
Filed under Waiting
Exiled
I'm still not back at the university. I don't know when I will be. It's beginning to get a little bit frustrating. And crankifying. I might send a little pigeon (or bat, because they live in the mango trees) out the window of my house with a little SOS tied to its leg saying, 'Please, for the love of God, bring me chocolate/vodka/snacks without an x!".
note: please ignore the fact that I'm outside the house right now - that fact just takes the drama away!
Filed under Waiting
Ok, I'm just reiterating that I will get to all of the emails in my inbox soon, and I will reply to everyone individually. I'm on a shared computer at the moment which is particularly slow and finicky. It also doesn't have one of the special boxes that keeps it on when there's a blackout, so I constantly lose everything I have written in an email and have to start again. Furthermore, it doesn't have a usb hole so that I can pre-write emails and then just copy and paste... point is, it's a little difficult at the moment. Please be patient, I'll get to you soon!
Filed under Waiting
Frustration
Ok, I am beginning to get a little bit tired of the technological challenges of this university. My office was supposed to be connected to the outside world (internet) by today, but it simply isn't. My computer seems to be the only one in the university with a web browser new enough to support web-based email, so it would be really nice if I could have some kind of connection. The guy whom I should be complaining to is based in the library, but at the moment the library is closed because of a sewerage leak, making the use of the library unhygenic (according to the sign on the door - I would tend to agree. And how does sewerage leak in the library? Don't ask!!!).
I had a cold over the weekend. I did go out Friday and Sunday nights, but I vegetated all day Saturday in a snotty haze.
Speaking of snot, the custard apples here are great.
Filed under Waiting
AT LAST!!!!
Oh my golly gosh.
I don't think anybody not in this country could understand what I have been through in the last week to get access to the internet. My new computer arrived in my office, but they don't have the cabling organised yet so it's not connected to the network. My username and password came, but wouldn't work on the other networked computer I had access to. I was given access to another computer, but its browser was so old it didn't support either this or my web-based email. I finally convinced the library staff to give me access to the computers in their lab, and now I have access to pinkukulele. Email is happening, I think, slowly... I hope... One of the problems is that the whole country, yes the WHOLE country, is using dialup internet. Think about it.
Anyway, things should start picking up soon as my office receives cables to the outside world next week.
In the meantime, I have been having various adventures. I am settling in to work at the University quite well, despite the techonological challenges. I have a spunky new office, as yet devoid of furniture except for a desk, chair and computer - but I received a shipment of 'sexy' new posters the other day, and my walls will soon be adorned. I am working with some lovely people, including some very enthusiastic students - fantastic! I have never actually worked with somebody who WANTS to learn, normally the word 'learn' comes followed closely by a long list of expletives!
My house is becoming homey. I was meant to move into an apartment on the university campus but various political difficulties, including almost all of the executive university staff losing their jobs, led to my accommodation going the way of the internet here. I am now sharing with another volunteer in a decidedly spacious house with a lovely view over the harbour. The addition of the pink ukulele and some beautiful crocheted coasters have brought some real style to our pad.
Nothing really dramatic has happened - I have seen a few rather large fights on the side of the road, normally due to car accidents, with police standing blithely by. Our hot water system sprung a leak and we had it replaced, and I fear that a mutant cockroach revolution is going to start from Port Moresby as the leaders, all at least four inches long, seem to live here.
Culinary highlights have continued with the consumption of lovely tuna, something delicious called lemonfish, and crayfish. Mmmm... The coffee here is also excellent, and there is soy milk to be had so both I and my belly are very happy.
There has been a lot of rain lately in Port Moresby. People are blaming it on residue from the cyclones in Queensland. I don't like it. It makes everything wet, and an extraordinarily large species of frog hops around the footpath outside my house, right where my feet are meant to be. I quite like frogs, just not kamikaze frogs. They're like the magpies that fly down in front of a car. I haven't stepped on one yet, but I have come close, and I have warned them!!!
I need to apologise to all of the people whose emails are sitting in my inbox. It looks as though I won't be able to read and/or reply to them all for a couple of days, so please hang in there and stay tuned to your inboxes.
Filed under Waiting
Solomons Sadness
I hope you guys get back to the Solomons soon!
Filed under Waiting
Lost in Limbo
I'm meant to be in Port Moresby right now. But 'something' went wrong and our visas went AWOL and we have been delayed for a week. So all of those goodbyes came with a 'yeah but I'm kind of still here for another week, oops!'
Whilst I'm not enjoying the heat of PNG and I'm stuck in ghastly wintery Melbourne weather for another week, it does mean another week of deliciousness. We spent the last couple of weeks having delicious treats in the spirit of 'the last time for a year' - notable ones include Gertrude's potato salad, chicken parma, copious amounts of cake, lasagne, and any other random things that took my fancy.
It also means another week of fun and games with Ya and Spinach, another week of shopping, another week of no mosquitos and another week of relaxing. So it's not all bad.
The tree kangaroos will just have to wait.
Filed under Waiting